High emotions lead to poor decisions. Negative emotions can also be quite uncomfortable. Emotional detachment can be an effective way to approach life. This isn’t the same as being emotionless. Think of it more as emotional control.
It’s wonderful to love your
partner. It’s not healthy to be so obsessed with them that you can’t manage the
rest of your life.
● It’s reasonable to be stressed at work. It’s counterproductive to be so stressed that you can’t sleep at night.
Too much emotion can blind us to flaws, create obstacles, and cause us to make poor decisions.
- Wise decisions. Being in a
highly emotional state greatly compromises your ability to make good
decisions. Wise decisions are based on logic, your values, your goals, and
maybe even your gut. You tend to ignore these things when you’re in a
state of emotion. Good decisions require a cool head.
- Less stress. Allowing and
maintaining a state of emotional agitation is stressful. It’s
uncomfortable for your mind and your body. The stress hormones that are
released during stress are hard on your body. If you’re emotionally
detached, you’re going to be far more relaxed.
- Less anger. Emotional
detachment results in less anger, too. In fact, it leads to feeling fewer negative emotions overall.
- You care less what others think about you. If you’re emotionally detached from the opinions of others, you
won’t care what others think about you. Most people are very concerned
with the opinions of others, which greatly limits their success.
- You feel less fear. Less fear results in more action. You accomplish more with less emotional fuss.
Now that you see how being emotionally detached can benefit you, you may wonder how you can develop this state of emotional control.
- Notice your emotions as they arise. There’s no good way to suddenly turn yourself into an emotionally
detached person. It’s a process.
The first step is to notice your emotions right when they begin.
- Separate your ego from reality. Someone smirking at your shoes has absolutely no impact on your
life unless you’re a shoe model. Any negative emotions you feel are simply
your ego talking.
Suppose someone criticized your
business plan. Even if the criticism is valid, there’s no reason to be upset.
Just improve your business plan.
- Use logic. Imagine you own
a real estate investment company and you’re located in Missouri. Now,
imagine that you’re looking for an apartment building to invest in. You’ve
found what you think are three reasonable options:
A nice building in San Diego. It’s
by the beach, and you love the beach.
A beautiful building in Manhattan.
You’re excited at the prospect of telling the world that you own such a
The last option is a
run-of-the-mill building in St. Louis. You’re very familiar with this type of
building, since you already own several that are similar. There are no
surprises here. It’s a solid deal.
Logically, the last option is the best. It
makes sense. The fact that you love the beach has nothing to do with evaluating
a business deal. The fact that you would be proud to own a building has nothing
to do with growing your business.
Logic is devoid of emotion.
- Develop the skill of dissipating emotions. There are many ways to ease your emotions. You can meditate. You
can focus on being mindful of your surroundings. You can simply give
yourself enough time that the emotion passes.
We all make poor decisions during times of strong emotion. It’s how our brain is wired. Logic goes out the window when we feel really good or really bad. Emotional detachment provides the best foundation for making wise decisions.
When you need to make a decision, separate your emotions from the situation and rely on your intellect. It doesn’t mean that you have to think like a robot. It means that you aren’t controlled by your emotional states. You’ll find it easier to make smart decisions in less time with less stress.